Stand By Me (1986)

Image by Columbia Pictures via IMDB

Hey guys! Hope your Thursday has treated you well. I don't have a lot to say today or any announcements, so let's just get into the review!

Stand By Me is another movie I'm not going to go into detail with the plot because the reward for this movie is the journey the characters take. The story is simple. Watching these characters grow is interesting. The movie is set in 1959 and involves four friends (played by Wil Wheaton, River Phoenix, Corey Feldman, and Jerry O'Connell) who go on a journey through the woods to see a dead body. Wheaton has recently lost his older brother (played wonderfully in flashbacks by the incredible John Cusack). He wants to be a writer, but his parents barely acknowledged him before his brother died, and now not at all afterward. Phoenix comes from a family of delinquents. Feldman is obsessed with the military, since his dad was a WWII vet, even though he's locked in a mental hospital. O'Connell's older brother is part of a gang, led by Kiefer Sutherland.

Nothing can go wrong when you're walking down train tracks.
Image by Columbia Pictures via IMDB

On their journey, they confront their own personal traumas and grow from boys to young men. Especially Wheaton's character, the story essentially focuses on him. Again, as much as I want to talk about individual scenes with you guys, this is a movie you need to see for yourselves. If you have seen it, message me so we can talk about it.

The movie is bookended by Richard Dreyfuss, playing an older version of Wheaton's character, reflecting on his childhood. Now he's an adult, a successful author, and has a son of his own. And he relates to his son through his own past experiences.

Sutherland would get more deadly with a knife in 24.
Image by Columbia Pictures via IMDB

Stand By Me was given a limited release on August 8, 1986, and a wide release on August 22. It was a big hit, making over $52 million on a budget of $8 million. The movie is based on a Stephen King novella "The Body." King said, at the time, that it was the best film adaptation of his work that had been done. There was even a story change near the end that King loved. In the novella, Phoenix's character picks up the gun, but it's Wheaton's character in the movie. From a storytelling standpoint, that makes perfect sense, since this is ultimately Wheaton's story. King loved the change, he said it made much more sense than what he wrote. He was so enamored with Reiner and Stand By Me that, a few years later, he made it clear when it came time to sell the film rights to Misery, that Reiner had to produce or direct it, which he did both. But that's another movie for another time. Personally, I enjoy adaptations of King's supernatural horror work, but with a couple of exceptions (1976's Carrie and 1980's The Shining), I think the best adaptations are the ones where the story is grounded in reality. Stand By Me, Misery, The Shawshank Redemption, and The Green Mile are all cinema classics. You can hear Reiner talking about the Stephen King stuff, as well as talking about how the movie reflected his relationship with his own father, in an interview with EMMYTVLEGENDS.ORG here.

Child actors usually aren't that impressive, but honestly, in the mid-80s you couldn't get much better than Wheaton, Phoenix, Feldman, and O'Connell in a movie starring four pre-teen boys. Honestly, I was kinda blown away by Wheaton in this. I've only seen him in Star Trek: The Next Generation and, to be blunt, he's not very good in that. And that's not his fault, he's a kid, and they weren't pulling compelling performances out of him. And to be even more honest, except for maybe Patrick Stewart, most of the acting on Star Trek TNG (especially the early seasons) isn't anything to write home about. But it's good to see Wheaton in something that old where he gives an amazing performance. The chemistry the four boys have, especially Wheaton and Phoenix, feels real. Reiner had the four boys play theater improv games together for two weeks to create a bond between themselves. And it shows. You can get a sense of this in a 1986 Entertainment Tonight interview with three of the boys. I also recommend this interview with O'Connell in 2019, it's pretty entertaining. In particular, he mentions being called "hyper-active" when he was a child, which is the same thing I was called by adults when I was a kid. I hadn't thought of that phrase in thirty years.

I don't care what the official "behind-the-scene" story is, I'm convinced that Feldman only smoke real ciggies.
Image by Columbia Pictures via Gunaxin

Filming of Stand By Me took place in Oregon and parts of Northern California. The movie itself is set in the fictional town of Castle Rock, Oregon, which threw me off at first. Castle Rock is a town used in many Stephen King stories and adaptations, but it's generally set in Maine. Much of the filming took place in Brownsville, Oregon, and the town has adopted July 23rd as Stand By Me Day. They have held an annual celebration since 2007.

The soundtrack for the movie is filled with period-appropriate rock and roll, centered by the title track, "Stand By Me" recorded by Ben E. King. The song was a #4 hit in 1961 and, due to the success of the movie, reentered and hit #9 in the Billboard Hot 100 in 1986.

The movie's scriptwriters, Raynold Gideon and Bruce A. Evans, were nominated for an Academy Award for Best Adapted Screenplay. It remains one of the most beloved movies to come out of the 80s, with 1991's Boyz n the Hood and 1995's Now and Then paying homage to it. 

River Phoenix was such a good actor. RIP.
Image by Columbia Pictures via IMDB

Final Thoughts

Just in case you couldn't tell from me gushing about this movie through the review, I really loved it. I can't find much to nitpick. It's a great adaptation of Stephen King's novella and a great coming-of-age film itself. The acting is great, the production is fantastic, the music is catchy, and the dialogue is memorable. It's funny, it's powerful, it's meaningful. I honestly can't even think of anything to nitpick. Watch this movie. You won't regret it.

That's what I thought, anyway. Go to JustWatch and see where it's streaming. And tell me what you think, if you do watch it or have seen it, I'd love to hear your opinion.

"What if you could travel to parallel worlds? The same year, the same Earth, only different dimensions.... My friends and I found the gateway. Now the problem is... finding a way back home."
Image by Columbia Pictures via IMDB

Next time, I finally complete my destiny and finish the Troll Quadrilogy. We're gonna talk about the OTHER Troll 3 (aka The Crawlers aka Creepers aka Contamination .7). Four Troll movies down. Do we finally get a legit good movie? Or is this another stinker? Come back next time to find out!

For Richer or Poorer (1997)

Image by Universal Pictures via IMDB

Long time no blog! Again. Seems like every time I get some momentum going, something happens. I am currently struggling with lymphedema, which is a circulation issue in my legs. When I stopped blogging, I had an infection, and the pain was so great that I was having a hard time thinking. It's much better now but still will require long-term treatment. But the good news is the pain is mostly gone and, when it's around, is far more bearable now.

Actual photo of me most days.
Image by Pixabay via Vic_B

So, it's time to get into the review that I know everyone has been hotly anticipating: 1997's For Richer or Poorer. To say that Tim Allen was red hot in 1997 was an understatement. His smash hit sitcom, Home Improvement, was on its seventh season. In the years prior he had dipped into feature films, starting in the hit The Santa Clause (1994) and voicing Buzz Lightyear in the mega-smash Toy Story (1995). Kirstie Alley was still riding the fame she received as a star on Cheers and was just starting a new sitcom, Veronica's Closet. She also had ventured into successful feature films, including the Look Who's Talking series (1989-1993) and Woody Allen's Deconstructing Harry (1997). Also in a supporting role is Wayne Knight, another huge star in 1997, appearing regularly on one of the biggest shows of the decade, Seinfeld, as well as an important supporting role in the record-breaking Jurassic Park in 1993. For Richer or Poorer has honestly a great core cast and they were all hugely popular at the time of this movie. This movie should have been a huge hit. So why is it only remembered, vaguely, as that Amish movie with Tim Allen on the poster?

The movie starts with the opening credits, "For the Love of Money" by The O'Jays is playing, the most stereotypical song about the rich. We see lots of images of things that rich people do. Like drinking champagne and paying for things with credit cards. There's a really funny bit showing a receipt and one of the items is a $4200 "virtual game." What kind of virtual games existed in 1997, let alone cost $4200? We fade into Wayne Knight being grilled by some IRS agents about potential tax fraud. Next, Allen and Alley are at a party, their 10th Anniversary. Allen takes this as an opportunity to pitch his new real estate development idea, a Biblically themed theme park called... The Holy Land! Complete with a wine bar called "Water into Wine," a burning bush, and a water slide for the "Jewish and Japanese guests" called "Torah! Torah! Torah!" A judge comes up through the crowd only to get her dress caught on fire from the burning bush. Allen puts it out with his glass of wine. If you think she'll come back later in the movie to play an important part, ding ding ding, winner winner chicken dinner!

After the party ends in disaster, Allen and Alley fight in their apartment. She wants a divorce. The marriage is over. The next day, Wayne Knight is trying to get out of the building with boxes of paperwork. Allen calls him into his office to show off some of his new, rich person purchases. Knight gets away and Allen goes to the bank. His accounts are locked. Confused, he calls Knight, who confesses that the IRS is looking into his company for funds misappropriation. Tim the Toolman then gets confronted by some IRS agents. It's from here that we are joined by Larry Miller's character, who is legit the only consistently funny thing in this movie. He plays an IRS agent by way of Dirty Harry, even referencing Harry later in the movie. He carries a gun and the first thing he tries to do when he sees Allen is shoot at him. This prompts Allen to flee the scene in a super awkward foot chase. Allen's business coat is buttoned the whole time while he's running and it looks weird. He steals a cab and accidentally picks up his wife, and they both flee to the country. They wreck the cab and end up in Amish territory.

Oooooooh! I can't wait for all the clever Amish jokes!
Image by Universal Pictures via IMDB

At this point, I won't bother going into a scene-by-scene breakdown of the rest of the movie, because I guarantee that you know exactly where the plot of this film goes. The two New Yorkers, Allen and Alley, pose as distant cousins to an Amish family, so they can hideout. It's a fish out of water story, as the city folk get used to a lack of indoor plumbing and tolling the fields for the first time. The cousins they are impersonating have well-known skills that they are expected to demonstrate (Allen with horse wrangling and Alley with cross-stitching), to comedic effect. A few jokes are cracked about the Amish, but way fewer than I thought there would be. They keep saying things an Amish person wouldn't normally say, and then say they come from a "liberal order" community. After a couple of weeks of getting up at 5 am and working hard all day, they start to enjoy it because country living is pure and clean and wholesome and blah blah blah. Then they start using their New York skillz to help their new Amish friends (Allen with real estate negotiation and Alley with fashion design) and help change the community for the better. Just when Allen and Alley's marriage starts to get back together, the IRS and a police task force show up. 

Deus Ex Policeina
Image by Universal Pictures via IMDB

Conveniently, at that exact same moment, the cousins that Allen and Alley have been impersonating also arrive in the village. So the New Yorkers go to court for their crimes, and their lawyer shows up late. Turns out that Wayne Knight had stolen all the money for himself, has been on the run, and the lawyer just happened to find him in the nick of time. Oh and the courtroom scene has the same judge from earlier, the one Allen threw the wine on at the party. Allen punches Knight in the courtroom, which I'm sure LegalEagle would take points away from for "Legal Realism." The case is thrown out! Allen and Alley are innocent, not only of tax fraud (which they were) but also apparently of stealing a cab and resisting arrest. Okay.

In the last scene, we end up with Allen and Alley returning to the Amish farm to apologize to the family, who they had gotten close with. This leads into another of the few funny parts of the movie, as the Amish dude (Jay O. Sanders, but he LOOKS just like Will Ferrell) smiles and says "You English think you are so smart. You really think we didn't know?" Turns out they figured out that Allen and Alley weren't their cousins pretty quickly, but didn't say anything because it was planting season and they needed the extra help. Absolutely classic, I love it! The movie ends most predictably, with the two New Yorkers giving up their greedy, materialistic, big city way of life to settle down on a farm in the country with their Amish neighbors.

Actual photo of Tim the Toolman reading the script of For Richer or Poorer
Image by Universal Pictures via IMDB

Phew. That was a ride. For Richer or Poorer wasn't as bad as I was expecting, but it wasn't very good, either. It had some high points. The acting isn't bad, on a base level. Everything is well made, visually. You get some of those weird camera angles that 90s movies were known for. I laughed a few times, also. There's a part where Tim Allen says "I know how these people work, I've seen Witness'" and that cracked me up. Everything with Larry Miller and Wayne Knight was gold. The ending, where we find out that the Amish family knew they were imposters all along, but needed the help, I think is a great little twist.

But ultimately, the movie is just boring and forgettable. The plot is almost as by-the-book as you can get. I didn't care about the story, didn't care about any of the characters or their journeys. Allen and Alley have no chemistry, which is fine if they don't love each other, but that's not the path the movie goes. There were a few laughs, but most of the jokes fell flat. And Tim Allen kept trying to do this... slapstick kind of humor. Falling and getting dragged by a horse and the like. Also, he made a lot of these... weird faces throughout the movie. I don't know what he was trying to do, but it isn't funny because I'm not three years old. Some of the comedy seems like it was aimed at young children, but it was rated PG-13 and had swearing in it. So what the hell. 

It's like someone told Allen to constantly make faces like he's taking a poop.
Image by Universal Pictures via IMDB

Also, it's TWO HOURS LONG! Why was this so long? You could have trimmed AT LEAST 20 minutes out of this movie, if not a whole 30-40 mins. The part where Allen is running, on foot, from the IRS? Gone. The part where he shows off all his cool, materialistic possessions to Wayne Knight? Gone. The part where Alley feeds Allen lung casserole at the Amish farm? Gone. The Holy Land presentation? Trimmed. See I just saved you like 10-15 minutes, just off the top of my head. You're welcome.

I will give it credit in that it's far less offensive than I was afraid it would be. There are still some tasteless Amish jokes, but there aren't many. Frankly, the most offensive part of the whole thing is the religious theme park idea. I'll admit, I like crass, offensive humor. I love South Park, usually. And when he first unveiled the park concept, I laughed. But then the bit went on and on and on, giving him plenty of time to make fun of Christians, Jews, and the Japanese. And after a while, it went from being funny to not funny to cringy.

Actual photo of Allen talking to the director.
Image by Universal Pictures via IMDB

The movie opened on December 12, 1997. I wouldn't call this movie a "flop" at the box office, but it did only make back $32.7 million from its budget of $35 million. $35 million? How the hell did this movie cost $35 million to make? How much did Allen and Alley get paid for this? $35 million in 1997 money is almost $62 million in 2022 money. For comparison, The Addams Family had a budget of $30 million. Nothing But Trouble cost $40 million. Jurassic Park was $63 million. All those movies had a bigger cast of stars and tons of elaborate practical or computer effects, you can see that budget cost on the screen. But with For Richer or Poorer, I just don't see where the money went, while watching the movie.

Final Thoughts

I think the most damning thing about For Richer or Poorer is, while I was watching, I realized about 2/3 of the way in that I had seen this movie before and completely forgotten that I had ever watched it. Many many moons ago, I know I must have rented this. The fact that it took me that long to remember should tell you what a lasting impression it had on me. It isn't the worst movie I've ever seen, by a long shot, but it is ultimately forgettable in the end.

But that's just what I thought today. Ask me in a year and I'll be all "What? What movie?" But if you want to see it yourself to form your own equally valid opinions, JustWatch will tell you where it's streaming.

Actual photo of Wayne Knight on the phone with his agent... okay, I think I killed that joke...
Image by Universal Pictures via IMDB

Next time, we're gonna take a step into the 80s and talk about one of the decade's most acclaimed coming-of-age stories, 1986's Stand By Me. Will this Stephen King adaptation live up to the hype? Or will it not be able to stand on its own legs? Tune in next time to find out!